And er um turning around and not being funny.

Bloody people who don't speak proper English like what I does. That drives me mad.
There is somebody in my office, who shall remain nameless,who insists on rabbiting on at ten to the dozen. I mean there is just no gap. No pause. I swear they must breath through their arsehole. To make sure that you can't get a word in edgeways they join sentences with "And er um" before spouting off another load of old shite.
Before launching into a major slag off session the sentence usually starts with "I'm not being funny but...". Well no they sent being at all funny, more often than not they are being a ship stirring sod.
"He/she/they turned around and said to me" is another one that winds me up. Why did he/she/they have to turn around to say something to you? Where they on a round about? Were they walking towards you backwards before they started talking? Are they a whirrling dervish or something? Arrrggh!!

Another thing. Why do some people have arks instead of ask? And yet don't have a problem with words like mask, task, flask? If you know why or I'd you know of any other quirks of speech that annoy the he'll out of you, share them with me by leaving a comment. Rant over. Spleen vented. Thanks for listening. TTFN.